If Audrey Hepburn had a potty mouth, she might have written It’s in His Kiss

c. 1955: Audrey Hepburn, near Rome, Italy (Photo by Norman Parkinson)

Pouf Honey! Before we begin, I said to the Mister recently that if his current Herr Direktör
didn’t let him go home early, I would go down to the set with a pair of pinking shears with which I’d cut off Little Herr!
What? Too much?! The Mister thought so…after he’d stopped laughing at my
Lucille Ball with Anger Management Issues folderol…

Babies, today at Beguiling I thought we’d do something a little
different and talk about the way of the world, the current economic
situation, this Winter’s horrendous weather conditions, the parlous
state of network television, the United States’ performance at the
Winter Olympics, the perilous political pandemonium on Earth in the
early 21st Century, and the plight of the Panda… Wait, who am I
kidding?! Let’s talk about MEEEEE
— and my novel!

If Paris Hilton had ever read a book, never mind written one…

If Kathy Griffin had toned it down — a little…

If John Travolta weren’t having a massage…

If Hedda Hopper had a sense of humor she would have written…

If Laura Petrie from The Dick Van Dyke Show wasn’t fictional she would
have written…

Like Jackie Collins and Billy Wilder had a lovechild…

Johnny Carson wishes he wasn’t dead so he could read…

Funnier than 12 Years a Slave, Sexier than Toy Story 3, More
Suspenseful than Sesame Street, Hollywoodier than Lincoln… It’s In
His Kiss…

For all those Hollywood Wives who are also Hollywood Beards…

Coming June 1st



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  1. February 28, 2014

    oooo, when we meet next week (when who-we-are-in-RL comes round with her Helpful Face) let’s do something with that Hollywood Wives Or Hollywood Beards as a “meme”…..just saying….delicious. DELICIOUS.

    • February 28, 2014

      Bonbons I get, I get how they’re transmitted…memes? So glad we are meeting in RL! Speaking of which, I had a friend in RL ASK me what a beard was, oh so very recently 😉 .

  2. Heather in Arles
    February 28, 2014

    Shazam! 😉

    • February 28, 2014

      Hey! I was just about to comment on your site… I like the one that looks the most rustic with the crazy vaulted rooms and what looks like a corner of swimming pool in the yard… xox!

  3. February 28, 2014

    I can’t wait! Just for the record I shave every day.

    • March 1, 2014

      I picked a typeface! It may not sound like much but, you’ll love this: Eames, Mid-century, Book, Modern!

      • March 1, 2014

        I’m going to send you a sample via email. It’s gorgeous!

  4. February 28, 2014

    ………my legs

    • March 1, 2014

      Always best when diving into Hollywood 😉 .

  5. February 28, 2014

    Well, then. I’m getting a copy.

    • March 1, 2014

      Jilly! Thank you! And thank you for being one of my first readers here at Beguiling! I’m going to sign that copy of yours 🙂 .

  6. George Kaplan
    March 2, 2014

    You are a funny lady, Queen Vickie! There are *beards* in Hollywood? I am shocked, SHOCKED, I tells ye! 😉 Next you’ll be telling me Clifton Webb was gay! Or Paul Lynde…or *** ******! Bwahahahaha!

    • March 5, 2014

      You just made my day! You might have to start calling me Aunt V. 😉 .

Comments are closed.